looking back

Last night I decided to dig out the only (secret) diary I ever kept. Once it got filled up, I somehow never decided to start a new one and put my thoughts on paper for posterity.

This diary spanned three years - my early teenage years to be precise. They're the chronicles of an ordinary teenager I suppose. Boys. Best friends. Changes. Crushes. Depressing moments. Dreams. Exams. Family. Fantasies. Fights. First times. Happiness. They were all there, with a good dose of teenage melodrama thrown in. Some things made me laugh and cringe at the same time, like my obsessions with certain actors. Some espisodes brought sad memories back to life, while others put a smile on my face. It's funny how then you start remembering all these other moments that you didn't even write about.

Then there were things which made me ponder about change...the change in me, changes in my dreams, my relationships. At that stage I imagined certain things would never change. Yes, some do stay the same. But others change so drastically, against our expectations, against the imagined life ahead, that we would have meticulously set out and planned. And these changes, these events, shape us into who we are now. Six years on, by how much have I changed?

"The only thing constant in life is change" François de la Rochefoucauld